The Benefit of Dissenting Opinion
Personal Development
November 10, 2010
Mike Myatt
Topics
conflict, disagreement, honesty, opinion, opposition, perception, Respect, transparencyI love vigorous debate, generally have an open mind, and actually enjoy having my thoughts and opinions challenged. If everyone always agreed with me conversation wouldn’t be very stimulating, and acquiring new knowledge and insight would certainly be more difficult. That said, I only really have the patience for intellectually honest discourse. I don’t care in the slightest about winning arguments, whether someone is right or wrong, or whether logic is sound or flawed, but I do care about motivation and intent. In the text that follows I’m going to ask you to do some soul searching – up for the challenge?
What follows might get a bit esoteric, but if you can get past the semantics of my philosophizing I believe you’ll find great value as I connect the dots on today’s topic. A few initial questions to ponder as we get started – How do you react when someone disagrees with you? Do you tuck tail and run desiring to avoid conflict at all costs? Do you dig-in your heels and prepare to defend your position to the death, all the while not really caring about how many casualties are incurred in the process? Or do you attempt to gain knowledge, understanding and perspective? Most importantly, do you genuinely engage in pursuit of the truth, or do you just wax eloquent in an attempt to justify your opinion or position?
It seems that in today’s world many people have lost the ability to disagree with someone, yet still respect them. If someone challenges your thinking and you immediately view them as an adversary there might be a problem with your perspective. If opposing views are worth the time and energy to debate, then they are worth a legitimate effort to gain alignment on perspective and resolution on position. However this will rarely happen if lines of communication do not remain open, and this in turn requires that candid, effective communication be maintained through a mutual respect and rapport.
Here’s my premise – few things benefit leaders in the ways that dissenting opinions do. The best leaders constantly seek out and engage those who challenge their thinking. They are curious, inquisitive, and have an insatiable appetite for learning. Most importantly, they truly care about what others think and why they hold the convictions they do. Whether you see opposing views and positions as conflict or opportunity says a lot about you as a person, and especially gives insightful commentary on who you are as a leader. Being able to discern and debate subjective positions with objectivity is an art form that must be present for effective leadership.
Respect and trust are earned by honoring commitments and doing the right thing regardless of opinion, sentiment or influence. It is through right acts, good decisions and honest communication that you earn respect and maintain rapport even with those who are not necessarily your greatest supporters. If you cannot lead someone with whom you disagree then you are not a leader – you’re a dictator. If you cannot surround yourself with those who challenge your thinking then you are not a leader – you’re an egomaniac.
Understanding and respecting other’s perceptions is such a critical part of being an effective leader that absent this ability I truly believe you cannot be effective in a leadership role. Great leaders take the time to understand the various constituencies and spheres of influence they come in contact with. “My way or the highway” thinking, and/or positional dictatorships rarely create the culture and performance demonstrated by winning organizations.
While I long ago reached the conclusion that perception does in fact matter, it may not be for the reasons that you might think. I have found that the majority of people tend to be myopic with regard to perception…they understand their own perceptions, but are quite often either ignorant or uncompassionate with regard to the perceptions of others. You see, the most important item to understand is that success as a leader has very little to do with your perception, but rather it has everything to do with the perception of others.
I’m not suggesting that you ignore your perception, subordinate your perception, or change your perception, but I am strongly suggesting that you take the time to both be aware of, and understand the perceptions of others. What I’ve just espoused has nothing to with compromising your values or being disingenuous. Rather my reasoning simply hypothisizes that if you’re not in touch with the perceptions of meaningful constituencies, your success will be impeded by your tunnel vision.
When it comes to authentic, transparent discourse, motivations matter. Those who place the care and regard of others above advancing their personal, positional, professional or political agendas will garner trust, respect and influence. You see it is precisely by not attempting to steamroll, manipulate or outsmart others, that you’ll be able to effectively convey your message even to an audience that might not otherwise be willing or receptive. Moreover, by having open and honest interactions you might actually learn something…
I can guarantee you that you’re not always right, that your thinking can be nuanced, that your knowledge can be deepened, that you can reframe and evolve your positions, and that your vision can be expanded, However these things don’t generally happen if you give monologues rather than participate in dialogues. If you don’t engage those who hold dissenting opinions and viewpoints in candid and open discussions you will struggle in developing to your true intellectual potential. Whether you agree or disagree is not the point…The point is that understanding the perceptions of others affords you a source of intelligence, a learning opportunity, and the ability to keep lines of communication open.
So, what do you think? Whether you agree or disagree I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments below.
Originally posted at n2growth.com/blog
Hearing and giving proper weight to dissenting opinions is so crucial to being an effective leader. Where most people fall on their face is they don’t know how to balance their authenticity with being open to the differing opinions of others.
You mentioned, “I’m not suggesting that you ignore your perception, subordinate your perception, or change your perception, but I am strongly suggesting that you take the time to both be aware of, and understand the perceptions of others.” The biggest challenge I’ve found among leaders isn’t necessarily the “what” but the “how”.
This is just as much an affair of the heart as it is an intellectual exercise. The perception that the leader has it all together and must chart the course is misguiding. Sure the leader needs to have a vision, but there is nothing that says that vision can’t be developed collaboratively, including the contribution of dissenting opinions.
You are absolutely right in that the mentality du jour of society seems to believe that differing opinions have to mean adversity and/or personal attacks. It doesn’t have to be that way, we just have to have the fortitude to make the decision for it not to be.
Awesome topic that doesn’t get near enough “air time”, Mike.
Cheers,
William
Hi William:
Thanks for your thoughtful comments. I agree with you that this topic is really a “state of mind” issue. If intentions are of a good faith nature, then vigorous debate should be intellectually challenging while being able to stay out of the gutter. Thanks William..
[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Trevor Nagle, William Powell. William Powell said: Do you embrace dissenting opinions? – http://bit.ly/8Xu97t – @mikemyatt makes a brilliant case for it on the #LeadChange blog. […]
I appreciate your insight and courage, Mike.
My natural inclination is toward customer advocacy, but I am more mediator than instigator. As many discussed in the Lead Change comments yesterday, an “Abundance Mindset” allows dissenting positions to be less “threat” and more “opportunity.”
When I AM inclined to fight, I do an internal motive-check before engaging. I find it wise to reexamine whose interests I’m amped to defend, BEFORE I instigate confrontation. When I’m truly representing customer interests, I press on past discomfort and engage in debate. If it’s just a bruised ego talking, I’ve found it better to step back and do more listening.
This is a great post. The world does ache for an increasing dosage of truth, spoken with both respect and honor.
Tristan
Hi Tristan:
Thanks for your insights. Here’s a thought for you to ponder: more instigation (proactive) means less time mediating (reactive). The key takeaway for me in reading your comment was the motivation check. Again, this post isn’t meant to promote anarchy, just honest and open discourse – the former doesn’t have to degenerate into the latter with proper intent and motivation. My feeling is that you are very skilled in this area already Tristan. Thanks again for your insights Tristan.
Excellent thoughts on this topic. This is one of the things that concern my wife and I most about our culture today. People simply do not know how (or are unwilling to) have a good, healthy argument. They are too afraid of offending someone. Thank you for addressing it directly and clearly. Couldn’t agree with you more about this issue’s impact on our effectiveness as leaders.
Hi Joe:
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. For me, it boils down to the fact that argument for the sake of argument is folly and rarely productive. Intentional challenges for the sake of making forward progress are fruitful endeavors worth the pain of what can often be contentious engagement. Thanks again for sharing Joe.
Terrific post; in fact, I’m copying it to all the members of my county Republican Committee in an effort to encourage such thinking. Thank you!
Thanks Kathy – I hope it helps spur some good debate.
Great post Mike! How do I get a copy of your book?
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