I knew Gary wasn’t happy.
Early in my career, when I first began leading team-leaders, one of them was clearly struggling – he looked frustrated, sounded frustrated, and it didn’t take a genius to know something was bothering Gary.
So I asked if I could buy him lunch and hear what was on his mind.
As we ate, he began sharing complaint after complaint…he’d been disrespected and abused by a senior manager, his team wasn’t doing as well as he hoped, he wasn’t sure the company’s vision matched his own…and so on.
Gary had appreciated my invitation to lunch and the opportunity to be heard.
But as he started sharing his concerns, I couldn’t stand it…
He was only halfway through his first issue before I interrupted and started “helping.” I offered solutions, tried to help him see the issue or person differently, or pointed out where he might be responsible.
Finally, he looked at me and said, “David! You asked me how I was feeling and what’s bothering me…quit arguing. I’m just trying to tell you how I feel.”
I could have helped Gary, but I wasn’t able to.
The good news is that it doesn’t have to be that way… [Read More]